Lately, I’ve been looking into doing some advertising for Fuzz Martin Media on LinkedIn, AdWords (Google), and Facebook.

While reading Facebook’s “Common Ad Mistakes” page, I came across this mistake:

Yes… their “correct” text says,

We’re going [sic] give them away for free for the first 50 customers.

“We’re going give?” Oh my.

…at how little advertising there is in Advertising Age magazine this week. Kinda scary.

…at least that’s the perception given by Barack Obama’s new commercial that is running on WTMJ. The spot plays off of John McCain saying that he would “hate to live in Milwaukee.”

Here’s the script:

Hi. This is Steve Cagle. You know, the other day I heard something outrageous. John McCain actually said in an interview with the Washington Post that he would, and I quote, ‘hate to live in Milwaukee.’ Hate to live in Milwaukee? Home of the Harley Davidson, Kopps custard and the Brewers? Well, this is the same John McCain who’s called laws making the federal government buy American-made products – quote – disgraceful. The same McCain who is going to keep giving tax breaks to companies that ship our jobs overseas. And the same John McCain who owns seven homes scattered around the country. Hey, I own just one, and I’m proud to be born and raised here in Milwaukee. So when John McCain says he’d hate to live in Milwaukee, I say, it’d be worse to see him live in the White House. We just can’t afford John McCain.

Woah! Harley Davidson and the Milwaukee Brewers are very protective of their brands! I’m about 95% sure that the Obama campaign did NOT get permission to refer to the Brewers, HD, or even Kopps in their spot. In fact, as a radio station, we are not allowed to mention Milwaukee Brewers in commercials even if we are giving away Brewers tickets. They do this to protect their brand and make sure their names aren’t tied to anything that could be construed as controversial. They also do it to make sure that nobody is making money off of their names without a fair cut.

I don’t think that they got permission, and I encourage the lawyers to send out the same cease and desist letters that they send to local radio stations when they air commercials for “a chance to win Milwaukee Brewers tickets.”

If the Brewers, Harley Davidson, and Kopps custard ARE endorsing Barack Obama, then it looks like I won’t be buying any Brewers tickets, I will make my first motorcycle purchase a Kawasaki, and I’ll only be eating custard at Culver’s.

Here’s the spot (via ABC – hence the ABC tones in the beginning – and I’m sure they endorse Obama anyway).

I just went to a marketing firm’s website and I was astonished by their terrible website:

1. The title on every page is, “Untitled Document.”
2. The horrendous flash open is 38 seconds long.
3. The horrendous flash open has obnoxious music that you can’t turn off.
4. The “skip intro” feature is impossible to see without scrolling down and rolling over a 25px wide graphic.
5. The header image creates rollover text in the body field that disappears (blank body area) upon rollout.
6. There is no phone number, address, email address, nada in the header/footer. You have to physically click on the “contact” link in order to get any info.
7. The portfolio page features a static flash document for each and every piece of their portfolio.
8. Each page in their portfolio is located in the root directory of the site. I’d hate to be their web guy (furthermore, I’d hate for them to be my web guy.)
9. Their services page just has a bunch of bullet points.
10. Their about us page has a bunch of text. (they should talk about more of what they can do for their client in the services page than what they do themselves in the about us page — in my humble opinion)

This company seems to have a lot of huge clients… which leads me to ask, “how big could they be if they did it right?”

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA… Forgive me, this will be my last post on this subject. It turns out that the new Microsoft “I’m a PC” television campaign was produced (wait for it) on a Mac!!!

Metadata found on Microsoft’s creative copy used in its ‘I’m a PC’ ad reveals that the graphics were actually produced using Macs running Adobe Creative Suite 3. After the details were published on the Flickr photo sharing site, Microsoft scrambled to polish off the embarrassing details last night.

That’s ridiculously silly. I love it!

The coolest part about Barack Obama’s new two-minute television commercial is that I can get up, run to the bathroom, change laundry loads, and get a beer before he gets through explaining how he’s going to spend all of our money! And, it’s draining his campaign account. I love it!

Yesterday, I told you about the new ad campaign from Microsoft that’s designed to take out Apple’s “I’m a Mac” campaign. Well, last night MS rolled out the first commercial in their new “I’m a PC” series:

The video is tastefully done and includes some humor (I like the shark and the ‘I turn #2 into energy’ parts). I still contend that talking about #2 (Apple not poo, this time) is not what the best direction for them, but they really couldn’t care less about what I think.

My theory: spend the $300 Million making your operating system bulletproof. The biggest problem with MS is the security and stability of their product. If they were to fix their problems and come out with a new, stable operating system, that isn’t rushed to market, and they would annihilate Apple.

…and that’s coming from a Mac.

Posted by email from Fuzz’s posterous

The other day, I was telling people how much I really enjoy the new Microsoft television spots that star Jerry Seinfeld and Bill Gates. It is well documented that I am not a fan of Microsoft, but these commercials are pretty funny and they get your attention.

This morning, I came across the news that Microsoft will now be ditching those ads (they called them ‘teaser spots’) in exchange for a spoof on Apple’s “I’m a PC” commercials. Apparently, they feature celebrities saying, “I’m a PC,” in order to reverse the ‘boring’ stereotype that Apple has created for them.

I think they will just make the celebrities look boring. Ewww. Eva Longoria uses a PC. Gross.

Apple already get tons and tons of celebrity endorsements without putting them in commercials. Turn on any television show or series and you always see stars using Apple MacBook Pros or iMacs as their computers of choice. It’s not just sometimes, either – it’s closer to 90% of the time.

This is a big win for Apple, in my opinion. The unwritten rule says that the only time you’re allowed to mention the competition is when the competition is in front of you. Like running a race, when you start looking behind you, you’re going to get passed. This is free publicity for Apple, and Steve Jobs should send Microsoft a thank you letter.

Anytime you refer to one of your menu items as, “______’s ’soon to be famous’ _______,” it is going to fail — miserably. It’s kinda like the fat girl you see at the mall with the shirt that says, “hot.” Uhm – no. You’re not. Sorry. The correct answer was: FAIL.

Unless, of course, your cooks are not washing their hands before preparing your “soon to be famous ______.” Then, as a display of your good grammar, you should add the correct prefix and name it, “______’s soon to be INfamous ______.”

Or just call it, “botulism.”

Examples: “Johnny’s Botulistic Nachos!,” “Danny’s ’soon-to-be-infamous’ Cooks’ Fingers!,” and my personal favorite, “Jose’s Infamous Boogersonyour Taco Platter.”

Now you can see my latest stock photos right here on FuzzMartin.com. Just look in the bottom right portion of the sidebar to view my latest accepted files at iStockphoto.com. You can click on them to see the larger versions… and to purchase them

It looks like the Dove campaign may be full of more shit than is ethically possible. From AdAge:

Dove’s “real beauties” may not be so real after all, at least by the account of a renowned airbrush artist. In a May 12 profile in The New Yorker posted online, Pascal Dangin of New York’s Box Studios is quoted as saying he extensively retouched photos used in the Campaign for Real Beauty, which, if true, could seriously undermine an effort that already has subjected Unilever to considerable consumer and activist backlash in recent months.

[UPDATE] Dove says it ain’t so.

Dove’s “real beauties” were not airbrushed, but their photos were treated to eliminate dust from the film and provide “color correction,” according to Unilever and celebrity photographer Annie Leibovitz.

In a joint statement provided by Unilever regarding its “Campaign for Real Beauty,” the company, Ms. Leibovitz, who created the ads in question, and the celebrity photo re-toucher she works with — Pascal Dangin, who kicked off the controversy with a quote he said was taken out of context in an interview with The New Yorker magazine — all denied substantially altering images in the much-lauded campaign.

Ugh.

This is cute!

I feel kinda like a dope this morning. Yesterday, I posted the Dove Onslaught ad that encourages you to, “talk to your daughter before the beauty industry does.”

Then I came across a video parody of the Onslaught video that I posted yesterday. In this video, it shows Axe commercials as the onslaught of self-image-reducing ads. Axe, of course, is owned by Unilever, who also owns the Dove brand.

Here’s the video:

I know this is all old news, but it’s new to me – and I think it’s completely unethical.

This morning was the first time that I had ever seen the Dove Onslaught viral video. As a dad of a little girl, it really touches home – especially after the Hannah Montana photo shoot fiasco.

If you recall, Dove also did the Dove Evolution video about the modeling and advertising industries:

Of course, Greenpeace doesn’t like Dove so much:

A gossip is one who talks to you about others; a bore is one who talks to you about himself; and a brilliant conversationalist is one who talks to you about yourself.

~Lisa Kirk

HT: CopyBlogger.com

With the whole “Go Green” mantra being dished out by every advertiser under the sun, I have seen a lot more tv and print spots with the tagline “Rethink, X”.  Where X is the service that the advertised brand provides.

Hey advertisers…listen up!

The only reason we thought a certain way about your service before was BECAUSE YOU TOLD US HOW TO THINK THAT WAY ABOUT IT!  WE (as the consumer) do not need to rethink anything, YOU are the ones that need to rethink your service and stop baraging the consuming public with messages of our shortcomings about having to re-program our worlds.

A Windex commercial recently said something to the effect of “we have developed a new formula that is safer for the environment and it cleans glass better than the original formula”. 

NO WAY?  Amazing that you only found this more efficient (and eco-friendly) formula after the green-meanies got all over your ass for contributing to the polluting of our planet.  It would have been a tragedy to find a better product to give consumers until absolutley necessary.

I have a message for consumers.  Rethink the way advertising affects your purchases.

I have determined that if you can alliterate, you can get a job writing commercials.

Professor in my marketing class to student: “you need to come up with a promotion for your marketing plan.”

Student: “You mean like Martini Mondays?”

Professor: “Oh, yeah, that’s really good.”

Me: “EEEEEK.”