Damn Neighbor Kids
July 2nd, 2009 by FuzzMy daughter has some friends over by her mom’s house. The boys are (usually) really nice and she really likes them. It’s her first real neighbor friends since her mom lives in what is basically a retirement neighborhood (not really, but most of her neighbors are probably enjoying liver and onions for dinner right now) and my neighbors are constantly outside smoking – not really my first choice for play friends.
This morning, my four-going-on-five-year-old daughter says, “Daddy, what are balls?” Knowing what she was getting at, I probed, “what do you mean by balls?” She nervously replied, “you know, on your body…”
I said, “lets just call those ‘jubilees,’ sweetie. The word, ‘balls,’ is rude.”
As you can imagine, I needed to find out where she learned her new vernacular… and, of course, it was the older of the two neighbor boys. I figured as much. I’m not really mad, because eight-year-old boys say those kinds of things, but I was taken aback since, well, she’s four.
Okay, time to go teach some boys what a ‘baseball bat’ is (an actual baseball bat, you pervert). 
July 2nd, 2009 at 4:52 pm
My daughter was watching American Gladiators last summer and one of the guys flexed his pecs. My daughter turned to me and said, “My friends call them balls, I think.” I asked which of her friends, and it was two girls.
At home, we call them “bits and pieces,” usually in this way regarding The Boy: “Do you have to go to the bathroom? No? Then let go of your bits and pieces” or “You know, that’s not a handle. You won’t fall over if you let go of your bits and pieces.”
It’s nice that your daughter feels comfortable asking you those things. She must really trust that you won’t laugh at her or make her feel bad for asking, and that’s a good thing.
July 7th, 2009 at 5:21 pm
Lol, I’m just waiting for some of that to start up. I’m also laughing at the “bits and pieces” bit. Around here the name “peanut” became the name because my now 6yo couldn’t pronounce the “s” at the time. So “peanut” works for us